Monday, June 11, 2007

I need a pick-me-up

I'm in a funk.

I can't seem to get ahead at work. Still banging my head against the same walls I was banging against four months ago. I look for small signs of progress, and I find them, but what value do they actually bring? It sometimes feels like I'm trying to travel from Europe to America, only I'm moving on a Glacier that's heading in that direction. Yeah, sure, I'll make it there, but it's gonna take a little while.

I can't finish the book I've been working on. It's become too try and involved for me, and coming off the deep logic of the Ted Noel book, "The Four Loves" is just too much for me. Which is a shame, because I really wanted to find great nuggets in it to use for STE in the coming year. Maybe I'll revisit it in a little bit, but I've pretty much lost desire to read it at all at this point in time (though, the skimming I did still had me coming away with some good nuggets of information).

And other stuff. It's also so ... meh, and rutty.

I think Relient K sums it up best:

hoa - oah
I've been banging my head against the wall
Whoa- oah
For so long it seems I knocked it down
Yeah it got knocked down
Whoa- oah
And the heating bill went through the roof

Whoa- oah
And the wall I knocked down is the proof
That my landlord needed to kick me out
I got evicted now I'm living on the street
My spirits lifted, oh wait that wasn't me
Too many turns, have turned out to be wrong
This time I learned that, I knew it all along
Got crashed where you burn and I'll be what you were
Whoa- oah
And I'll see what I should, and I'll see that its good, that its good

To experience the bitter-sweet, to taste defeat
Then brush your teeth
Experience, the bitter-sweet, to taste defeat
Then brush your teeth

Cause I struggle with forward motion
I struggle with forward motion
We all struggle with forward motion

Cause forward motion is harder then it sounds
Well everytime I get some ground I gotta turn myself around again
It's harder then it sounds
Well everytime I get some ground I gotta turn myself around again

Whoa- oah
I've been banging my head against the wall
Whoa- oah
For so long it seems I've got knocked out
Yeah got knocked out cold
Whoa- oah
And the medical bills went through the roof

Whoa- oah
And the scar on my head is the proof, that I'll still remember this when I get old
I got evicted now I'm living on the street
My spirits lifted, oh wait that wasn't me
Too many turns, have turned out to be wrong
This time I learned that, I knew it all along
Well I grasped to concept that I'll sleep where you slept
Whoa- oah
Well I know I need help when I allow my self
Allow myself

To experience the bitter-sweet, to taste defeat
Then brush your teeth
Experience, the bitter-sweet, to taste defeat
Then brush your teeth

Cause I struggle with forward motion
I struggle with forward motion
We all struggle with forward motion

Cause forward motion is harder then it sounds
Well everytime I get some ground I gotta turn myself around again
It's harder then it sounds
Well everytime I get some ground I gotta turn myself around again

Cause I struggle with forward motion
I struggle with forward motion
We all struggle with forward motion

Cause I struggle with forward motion
I struggle with forward motion
We all struggle with forward motion

Well everytime I get some ground I gotta turn myself around again
Cause I struggle with forward motion
I struggle with forward motion
We all struggle with forward motion


(this is how bad the rut is ... I couldn't even find a good enough YouTube clip for the song)

1 comment:

Jenette said...

Tyler. There's so much I'd write about your current state of mind, but I sense that a comment on a blog ain't the place. I'll be praying for you and Rachel both.

And pbbt to you about the Cheerios! :)