I tend to think of myself as an optimist. I think it's one of my better traits. I always look at potential and possibilities when faced with a set back. It certainly helps to be this way in the world of Insurance Sales.
I think, however, I would help myself further if I took time to actually celebrate the good things in my life. To think about what is making my glass half-full instead of half empty. It's so easy in life to focus on the things that frustrate us, and gloss over the things that make us happy and help guide us through the day.
I don't bust my hump trying to get new groups and sell insurance policies because I want to come home to a messy apartment that's too small for all the stuff we've accumulated. I do it because one day I want Rachel and I to own a beautiful house.
I don't pour my sweat, tears, and blood into Sigma Theta Epsilon because I want to bicker about policy or have frustrations with other members. I do it because I love to see potential transformed into an honest Christian man, ready to be a clergy or lay leader.
I don't put my effort into jOURney because I want to be disappointed when the worship space is less than half full. I do it because I know there's a need for this kind of church, and I know the impact it's already having life-by-life.
And yet, I never really sit down to meditate on things like this. I sit down and grab my hair and try to figure out how I'm going to pay the bills, how I'm going to manage stress, and if the projects I love and care about will ever thrive like I know they can. But I don't sit down and be honestly thankful that I have a fairly spacious apartment to come home to, that I have worthwhile organizations to volunteer for, and taht I have a job that allows me to have a flexible schedule and the possibility for rags to riches.
And I think ... I need to do this more.
No, I don't think that. I know it.
And then, I can become a real optimist.
No more will I see my glass as half-full. I'll see it as on the way to being overflowing.
Showing posts with label STE. Show all posts
Showing posts with label STE. Show all posts
Monday, April 07, 2008
Thursday, February 28, 2008
Do You Ever Inspire Yourself?
I'm not trying to sound egotistical with that question. I'm seriously wondering: do you ever inspire yourself?
I ask because this morning I inspired myself. In my role as National Vice President for Sigma Theta Epsilon, I'm posting a discussional (my word for devotional that hopefully invites discussion and feedback) each day for Lent. That's going to be 46 of these discussionals in 46 days, counting one on each Sunday, as well. This has been a serious time of growth for me, as well as drawing close to the Lord. I'm really amazed at how much it's done that for me.
But, beyond that, the lastest discussional entry in the series inspired me to attempt a project. It's not that I hadn't had similar thoughts before, but they had never been as clear or as focused or as "I need to do this" as they were when I re-read what I had posted for discussional.
I'm just wondering how common this is. Do you ever do something that gives you inspiration to do something else? Do you ever inspire yourself?
(Of course I realize I may be giving myself too much credit in the inspiration side ... but I think I sound just as vain if I try to say "God prompted to me to write this", so there goes another question and conundrum ... )
I ask because this morning I inspired myself. In my role as National Vice President for Sigma Theta Epsilon, I'm posting a discussional (my word for devotional that hopefully invites discussion and feedback) each day for Lent. That's going to be 46 of these discussionals in 46 days, counting one on each Sunday, as well. This has been a serious time of growth for me, as well as drawing close to the Lord. I'm really amazed at how much it's done that for me.
But, beyond that, the lastest discussional entry in the series inspired me to attempt a project. It's not that I hadn't had similar thoughts before, but they had never been as clear or as focused or as "I need to do this" as they were when I re-read what I had posted for discussional.
I'm just wondering how common this is. Do you ever do something that gives you inspiration to do something else? Do you ever inspire yourself?
(Of course I realize I may be giving myself too much credit in the inspiration side ... but I think I sound just as vain if I try to say "God prompted to me to write this", so there goes another question and conundrum ... )
Thursday, November 29, 2007
What is this again?
Hmmm
yeah.
On November 2nd I already had two blogs posted this month.
Today is the 29th. This will be the third. Oops.
Sometimes when I don't blog for a while, you should worry about me. It could be a sign that I'm getting down and depressed. This time, that's not the case. I've just been busy. With Thanksgiving, and seeing three of four parents, and work, and Rachel's parties, and fraternity stuff, it's just been a hectic month.
But I'm good. Just busy. And it's not like things are gonna clear up anytime soon. Not with Christmas around the corner, more work, more parties for Rachel, maintaining programming for the fraternity, and trying to see three of four parents again this month (different three, though), I don't see it letting up.
Although, I do have a declaration. Since, oh, about 2nd grade, I've been overweight and noticeably so. Well, I'm tired of that. So, I'm starting a diet and exercise program, along with Rachel, to lose sixty pounds. I'm hoping that by the time the last political campaign ad for the 2008 elections is aired (and God, how I can't wait for that to happen) my goal will be met.
So, if you see me on a regular basis, keep me accountable. And if you come to a table with me to break bread, keep me accountable. Please.
yeah.
On November 2nd I already had two blogs posted this month.
Today is the 29th. This will be the third. Oops.
Sometimes when I don't blog for a while, you should worry about me. It could be a sign that I'm getting down and depressed. This time, that's not the case. I've just been busy. With Thanksgiving, and seeing three of four parents, and work, and Rachel's parties, and fraternity stuff, it's just been a hectic month.
But I'm good. Just busy. And it's not like things are gonna clear up anytime soon. Not with Christmas around the corner, more work, more parties for Rachel, maintaining programming for the fraternity, and trying to see three of four parents again this month (different three, though), I don't see it letting up.
Although, I do have a declaration. Since, oh, about 2nd grade, I've been overweight and noticeably so. Well, I'm tired of that. So, I'm starting a diet and exercise program, along with Rachel, to lose sixty pounds. I'm hoping that by the time the last political campaign ad for the 2008 elections is aired (and God, how I can't wait for that to happen) my goal will be met.
So, if you see me on a regular basis, keep me accountable. And if you come to a table with me to break bread, keep me accountable. Please.
Monday, August 06, 2007
Good Food, and Good Friends
As I posted a little while back, I've been in a funk. I struggled with work, I felt no forward motion in many areas of my life, and I was frustrated that my wife couldn't get a job. I hadn't been blogging because I didn't want to just emo all over the place. I know how Quinn gets around Emo, and I didn't want to have to face that.
However, I think the corner is being turned. The black cloud of funk is being lifted. The ... well, I'm sure you can think of a better cliche than I can.
And it all revolves around what I should have figured in the first place:
Good food, and good friends.
This past Wednesday, Rachel and I made the trip to Ada to have dinner with the Hoseks. We'd made a bet a few years ago, and I finally got him to pay up. We went down, had dinner, played boche ball, and talked with another married couple for a few hours about the struggles of early years in marriage, tight finances, and all sorts of topics. It was a really good way to break up a week.
Then, this past weekend was STE National Officer Advance. It's always a blessing to see and interact with those guys, even if i couldn't do better than second place at a poker table. Even if Krispy Kreme donuts are better than Dunkin. There was plenty of bonding, plenty of laughter, and plenty of growth. Not to mention the fact that Shan makes a wicked awesome steak, Skyline is awesome for lunch, and LaRosa's isn't bad for dinner.
The funk is lifting. I can feel it. Good things are gonna happen. Rachel's got a job. A full time job. And I've got hope for my job that something soon will break and be good. Very good.
I can see a light that is coming for the heart that holds on. There will be an end to the struggles. But until that day comes. Still I will praise you.
However, I think the corner is being turned. The black cloud of funk is being lifted. The ... well, I'm sure you can think of a better cliche than I can.
And it all revolves around what I should have figured in the first place:
Good food, and good friends.
This past Wednesday, Rachel and I made the trip to Ada to have dinner with the Hoseks. We'd made a bet a few years ago, and I finally got him to pay up. We went down, had dinner, played boche ball, and talked with another married couple for a few hours about the struggles of early years in marriage, tight finances, and all sorts of topics. It was a really good way to break up a week.
Then, this past weekend was STE National Officer Advance. It's always a blessing to see and interact with those guys, even if i couldn't do better than second place at a poker table. Even if Krispy Kreme donuts are better than Dunkin. There was plenty of bonding, plenty of laughter, and plenty of growth. Not to mention the fact that Shan makes a wicked awesome steak, Skyline is awesome for lunch, and LaRosa's isn't bad for dinner.
The funk is lifting. I can feel it. Good things are gonna happen. Rachel's got a job. A full time job. And I've got hope for my job that something soon will break and be good. Very good.
I can see a light that is coming for the heart that holds on. There will be an end to the struggles. But until that day comes. Still I will praise you.
Tuesday, April 17, 2007
Maybe I got one ...
Well, I asked for a break, maybe one is on the horizon. Just not sure it'll be soon enough to count for my next quota deadline.
Kris and I got a call from someone looking to add Aflac to their portfolio. That's right. Not a referral, not a warm reception ... someone actually asked us to come out by calling us. We gathered information on them, and it looked like a 30-40 man group. Pretty decent size, definitely worth pursuing (of course, I think any sale is worth pursuing). So, we get there, and we're going through the presentation, and find out the group is actually about 100 employees locally, and about 350 employees nationally.
So that's pretty sweet. Here's hoping it works out. T'would be a decent payday, to say the least.
On a related note, I'm growing more and more comfortable presenting the products every day. I'm interjecting more in presentations, and adding small insights that are helpful. Very cool to see actual growth in myself like that.
On an unrelated note, I'm totally excited to start working on the program book for STE. I'm overloading myself with ideas, and I need to schedule some time soon to work on putting the ideas in writing and moving forward with them. It's an exciting overwhelming!
Kris and I got a call from someone looking to add Aflac to their portfolio. That's right. Not a referral, not a warm reception ... someone actually asked us to come out by calling us. We gathered information on them, and it looked like a 30-40 man group. Pretty decent size, definitely worth pursuing (of course, I think any sale is worth pursuing). So, we get there, and we're going through the presentation, and find out the group is actually about 100 employees locally, and about 350 employees nationally.
So that's pretty sweet. Here's hoping it works out. T'would be a decent payday, to say the least.
On a related note, I'm growing more and more comfortable presenting the products every day. I'm interjecting more in presentations, and adding small insights that are helpful. Very cool to see actual growth in myself like that.
On an unrelated note, I'm totally excited to start working on the program book for STE. I'm overloading myself with ideas, and I need to schedule some time soon to work on putting the ideas in writing and moving forward with them. It's an exciting overwhelming!
Monday, April 16, 2007
Replacing an Icon
Been busy lately. This past weekend was Sigma Theta Epsilon's National Conclave of Chapters. Leading up to the meeting, I was National Secretary, and coming out of the meeting, I'm now National Vice President.
It's odd. I was elected National Secretary three years ago (in 2004), and I had no timidity about my ability to do the job, even though it didn't exactly match my skillset. I was a wide-eyed kid, about to be fresh out of my undergraduate studies, but I knew what I needed to do, and I knew I could do it.
It probably helped a great deal that I had a checklist of tangible measurable things (like getting out newsletters, membership records, and the such) that I could measure my success against that would help me. It also helped my confidence that I walked into the office with its standards not exactly the highest, and simply catching up on the past two guys' lack of work would be a success.
Now ... I'm National Vice President. Charged with being the programming and spiritual leader of the fraternity. Something much more suited to my skillset. And yet, I'm much more tentative about having success. Some of that is the success in this office is less tangible and less in my full control. Are there programs available? Are people using the programs? Part of it also has to be that I'm replacing someone I consider an icon of the fraternity, and a mentor of mine, in the position.
I think I'm off to a good enough start. Lead devotion Sunday Morning, encouraging us as a fraternity and as men of God to not limit ourselves to trying to do what is good, but try to do what is better. Introduced a programming theme, "Made For Love", and using a key verse of Micah 6:8, encouraged our members to be made for love, and to love loving others.
And now to follow through.
The weekend was amazing, but difficult to get through at times. And not just for business stress. Also for emotional baggage. Shan lead worship on Sunday morning, and the beauty of my brothers singing in my voice moved me, and brought me memories of JZ. I almost doubled over, overcome with emotion, and had to leave the room, but was able to make it through. The image of JZ looking down on conclave from heaven, and smiling as we moved forward as fellow workers with God was almost too much for me to bear.
It's not as though I shouldn't have seen it coming. I've had a string of bad days recently where thoughts of JZ have just rushed into my head and overwhelmed my emotions. About ten days ago, I was out shopping with my wife and her mother, and just got this urge to talk to JZ about the Indians ... get his opinion on if they could only keep one, who should they keep: Pronk or Hafner. I could hear him arguing both sides, just trying to put all information out. And I missed him so much. And I still miss him so much.
I finally figured out on the drive home why this weekend was so difficult for me in regards to JZ memories. One, JT was the alumni delegate for my "home" chapter, and JZ's best friend. Two, of the two events I had no control over that pushed me to National focus, JZ was integral to both. He nominated me for Epsilon President way back in February of 03, and he organized the first multi-chapter STE Bowl game, which lead to my desire to see more of the same, as well as some recognition for me as chapter president, when the game was a great success.
I can credit my national involvement and my ascension nationally at least in part to JZ. And he's an icon in my life that none will ever replace.
I think I should look into getting some grief counseling. I've been overcome by emotion often recently. I've stared into the heavens and longed to talk sports with JZ. I've stood in department stores holding conversations with JZ. I've closed my eyes and asked Grandpa if he's proud of me. I've driven down 30 and wondered why I didn't do more to be closer with Erin.
It's not that I don't like to remember. I love to remember. It's not even the tears I don't like, because they remind me that I have great joy in part because of those I miss. It's just ... I feel like I'm not making progress, and I don't know what else to do.
I knew I was lucky when I got through 22+ years of life before I lost someone very close to me to the icy hand of death.
I guess I never realized just how lucky.
It's odd. I was elected National Secretary three years ago (in 2004), and I had no timidity about my ability to do the job, even though it didn't exactly match my skillset. I was a wide-eyed kid, about to be fresh out of my undergraduate studies, but I knew what I needed to do, and I knew I could do it.
It probably helped a great deal that I had a checklist of tangible measurable things (like getting out newsletters, membership records, and the such) that I could measure my success against that would help me. It also helped my confidence that I walked into the office with its standards not exactly the highest, and simply catching up on the past two guys' lack of work would be a success.
Now ... I'm National Vice President. Charged with being the programming and spiritual leader of the fraternity. Something much more suited to my skillset. And yet, I'm much more tentative about having success. Some of that is the success in this office is less tangible and less in my full control. Are there programs available? Are people using the programs? Part of it also has to be that I'm replacing someone I consider an icon of the fraternity, and a mentor of mine, in the position.
I think I'm off to a good enough start. Lead devotion Sunday Morning, encouraging us as a fraternity and as men of God to not limit ourselves to trying to do what is good, but try to do what is better. Introduced a programming theme, "Made For Love", and using a key verse of Micah 6:8, encouraged our members to be made for love, and to love loving others.
And now to follow through.
The weekend was amazing, but difficult to get through at times. And not just for business stress. Also for emotional baggage. Shan lead worship on Sunday morning, and the beauty of my brothers singing in my voice moved me, and brought me memories of JZ. I almost doubled over, overcome with emotion, and had to leave the room, but was able to make it through. The image of JZ looking down on conclave from heaven, and smiling as we moved forward as fellow workers with God was almost too much for me to bear.
It's not as though I shouldn't have seen it coming. I've had a string of bad days recently where thoughts of JZ have just rushed into my head and overwhelmed my emotions. About ten days ago, I was out shopping with my wife and her mother, and just got this urge to talk to JZ about the Indians ... get his opinion on if they could only keep one, who should they keep: Pronk or Hafner. I could hear him arguing both sides, just trying to put all information out. And I missed him so much. And I still miss him so much.
I finally figured out on the drive home why this weekend was so difficult for me in regards to JZ memories. One, JT was the alumni delegate for my "home" chapter, and JZ's best friend. Two, of the two events I had no control over that pushed me to National focus, JZ was integral to both. He nominated me for Epsilon President way back in February of 03, and he organized the first multi-chapter STE Bowl game, which lead to my desire to see more of the same, as well as some recognition for me as chapter president, when the game was a great success.
I can credit my national involvement and my ascension nationally at least in part to JZ. And he's an icon in my life that none will ever replace.
I think I should look into getting some grief counseling. I've been overcome by emotion often recently. I've stared into the heavens and longed to talk sports with JZ. I've stood in department stores holding conversations with JZ. I've closed my eyes and asked Grandpa if he's proud of me. I've driven down 30 and wondered why I didn't do more to be closer with Erin.
It's not that I don't like to remember. I love to remember. It's not even the tears I don't like, because they remind me that I have great joy in part because of those I miss. It's just ... I feel like I'm not making progress, and I don't know what else to do.
I knew I was lucky when I got through 22+ years of life before I lost someone very close to me to the icy hand of death.
I guess I never realized just how lucky.
Sunday, October 22, 2006
Posting from Illinois!
This has certainly been a fun weekend ... I'm in Illinois for my Fraternity at one of our four Fall Gathering sites. The day was an absolute blast yesterday. From Alex and I umping a softball game from atop a band director's perch, to a really awesome time of bonding during a religious project, to activating new brothers at a new colony, to going out with 20 of my brothers for pizza and soda, just an awesome, awesome time.
But I'm done travelling on my weekends. I want a week off.
Seriously.
This is not only the third different city I've been in the last three weekends, it's the third different state.
Two weeks ago, my wife, myself, and my mother-in-law travelled down to Salem, WV for the apple butter festival. Last week, my wife and myself travelled down to Columbus for a "birthday extravaganaza" for me put on by my mother-in-law. And, now, I'm in Illinois, just outside of the campus of Illinois Wesleyan University.
Not that I haven't had a blast the past three weeks. Don't get me wrong, I've enjoyed them all greatly. I just am sitting here on my hotel bed posting, and I'd much rather have slept on my own pillow-top bed last night, with my new non-compression pillow.
Plus, I haven't been to Five02 in almost a month now thanks to travelling ... and I really can't wait to go again.
But I'm done travelling on my weekends. I want a week off.
Seriously.
This is not only the third different city I've been in the last three weekends, it's the third different state.
Two weeks ago, my wife, myself, and my mother-in-law travelled down to Salem, WV for the apple butter festival. Last week, my wife and myself travelled down to Columbus for a "birthday extravaganaza" for me put on by my mother-in-law. And, now, I'm in Illinois, just outside of the campus of Illinois Wesleyan University.
Not that I haven't had a blast the past three weeks. Don't get me wrong, I've enjoyed them all greatly. I just am sitting here on my hotel bed posting, and I'd much rather have slept on my own pillow-top bed last night, with my new non-compression pillow.
Plus, I haven't been to Five02 in almost a month now thanks to travelling ... and I really can't wait to go again.
Friday, September 15, 2006
Random Items
Fall Television
Survivor
Alright, so Rachel got me hooked on Survivor a little while back. I think I watched the blasted thing once before we started dating, and now it's a regular part of our life. So, it is what it is, and it entertains me, so it's something I watch now. Watched the unimpressive season premiere last night. Wasn't great, wasn't bad. I'm always amused by the contestants who seemingly have never seen the show and are so surprised by certain "twists" that always show up.
I'm pretty certain that I've never caught a full season. Last season, Rachel and I missed the first episode, and the season before we missed the finale (way to go, miss the finale of a reality tv show). Here's guessing what show we'll miss this season.
Still too early to call a favorite, at least for me.
Dancing with the Stars
This one is *technically* my fault. I wanted to watch last season to see my boy Kenny Mayne and to a lesser degree Jerry Rice. So that opened the floodgates for it to become a staple. I don't care too much for it this year, but it's entertaining to see A. C. Slater on television again (oh, wait, his name is Mario Lopez? Whoops). My money's on him, although we have a conundrum ...
Gilmore Girls
Another show Rachel got me hooked on. This is the first season we'll have a chance to see first-run episodes as they show (just got the WB this summer), but it's on opposite DWTS. So, which do we watch? The Reality Show with a recap/result show the next day, or the sitcom with reruns in a few months?
I guess we'll figure it out, but my vote is for Gilmore Girls, if only because Luke is the closest any television show has come to putting me on tv.
Sigma Theta Epsilon
Working with some guys from my home chapter to try to help out with rebirthing the chapter at Ohio Univeristy. We met tonight for dinner (Rachel made us meatloaf and mac-n-cheese ... yum), and it was a very good meeting. We left with what seems to be a good direction and a good plan. Let's hope God blesses it. Your prayers for it probably wouldn't hurt either.
This is an exciting time of year for the fraternity. With schools starting up for the year, a lot of chapters will start to have new members. It's always neat to meet new guys at my home chapter, and I really hope we get some new guys interested in Nationals who will interact with us on the Bulletin Boards. I guess time will tell.
Of course, that also means my work load goes up there. Which is a good thing. I love working on things for STE. Working on the newsletter, printing shingles, planning meetings, deciding my future plans ... all stuff I love.
Random God Moment
So, I was driving home the other day, and had one of those wierd "God" moments. Where He brings to mind something random and then speaks to me through/about it. What he brought to mind is a television show Rachel sometimes watches on HGTV called "I want that". And it made me think, shouldn't I be reading the Bible and looking for things that make me say "I want that"? Shouldn't I be living a life so that others will see God in me and through me and say "I want that?" So, I'm going to be trying to make a list of "I Want That: Spiritual" for myself, and see what I come up with. But I'd also love to know what's on your "I Want That: Spiritual" list.
I think that's all for now ...
Survivor
Alright, so Rachel got me hooked on Survivor a little while back. I think I watched the blasted thing once before we started dating, and now it's a regular part of our life. So, it is what it is, and it entertains me, so it's something I watch now. Watched the unimpressive season premiere last night. Wasn't great, wasn't bad. I'm always amused by the contestants who seemingly have never seen the show and are so surprised by certain "twists" that always show up.
I'm pretty certain that I've never caught a full season. Last season, Rachel and I missed the first episode, and the season before we missed the finale (way to go, miss the finale of a reality tv show). Here's guessing what show we'll miss this season.
Still too early to call a favorite, at least for me.
Dancing with the Stars
This one is *technically* my fault. I wanted to watch last season to see my boy Kenny Mayne and to a lesser degree Jerry Rice. So that opened the floodgates for it to become a staple. I don't care too much for it this year, but it's entertaining to see A. C. Slater on television again (oh, wait, his name is Mario Lopez? Whoops). My money's on him, although we have a conundrum ...
Gilmore Girls
Another show Rachel got me hooked on. This is the first season we'll have a chance to see first-run episodes as they show (just got the WB this summer), but it's on opposite DWTS. So, which do we watch? The Reality Show with a recap/result show the next day, or the sitcom with reruns in a few months?
I guess we'll figure it out, but my vote is for Gilmore Girls, if only because Luke is the closest any television show has come to putting me on tv.
Sigma Theta Epsilon
Working with some guys from my home chapter to try to help out with rebirthing the chapter at Ohio Univeristy. We met tonight for dinner (Rachel made us meatloaf and mac-n-cheese ... yum), and it was a very good meeting. We left with what seems to be a good direction and a good plan. Let's hope God blesses it. Your prayers for it probably wouldn't hurt either.
This is an exciting time of year for the fraternity. With schools starting up for the year, a lot of chapters will start to have new members. It's always neat to meet new guys at my home chapter, and I really hope we get some new guys interested in Nationals who will interact with us on the Bulletin Boards. I guess time will tell.
Of course, that also means my work load goes up there. Which is a good thing. I love working on things for STE. Working on the newsletter, printing shingles, planning meetings, deciding my future plans ... all stuff I love.
Random God Moment
So, I was driving home the other day, and had one of those wierd "God" moments. Where He brings to mind something random and then speaks to me through/about it. What he brought to mind is a television show Rachel sometimes watches on HGTV called "I want that". And it made me think, shouldn't I be reading the Bible and looking for things that make me say "I want that"? Shouldn't I be living a life so that others will see God in me and through me and say "I want that?" So, I'm going to be trying to make a list of "I Want That: Spiritual" for myself, and see what I come up with. But I'd also love to know what's on your "I Want That: Spiritual" list.
I think that's all for now ...
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